The table plans are done. The cake is being made. The dresses are steamed.
You’re ticking off the last bits on your wedding checklist when you get to the biggie… Bride’s Lucky Sausages.
Have you got them? Do you need them? Do you PLANT them?
Manicured lawns? Yes.
A few rogue prosecco bottles? Possibly.
The odd lost wedding shoe? Wouldn’t surprise us.
PLANTED SAUSAGES?
Apparently, yes. Lots of them.
If you’re a bride-to-be, you’ve probably heard the old wives’ tale: bury a sausage the night before your wedding and it’s supposed to bring good weather for the big day. If you haven’t, we’re going to presume you’ve been living under a rock. (No offence.)
Now then, Roundthorn brides (and bridesmaids) have taken this trend very seriously.
Picture it…
It’s around 8pm the night before the big day. They’re starting to wind down, ready to get a good night’s sleep before the early alarm and a morning of bridal preparations.
There’s probably been a couple of proseccos consumed. Hair has been freshly washed. Everyone is in matching PJs. They’ve set out the personalised, hand-painted champagne flutes (another trend we are absolutely here for!). The little flower girl gift bags are laid out in order. The bridesmaids’ hangers are all hanging, facing the same way.
The last job of the night? Head out into the gardens.
“Please could we borrow a fork from the kitchen…?”
And off they go. Fork in one hand, pack of Heck’s ‘Bride’s Lucky Sausages’ in the other.
Searching for the best sausage-planting spot, scratching at the solid, drought-ridden ground with the kitchen fork, creating the perfect sausage-sized hole ready for burying.
Apart from… the hole isn’t very deep.
And the bride the week after, on the same mission, might just dig up the week-old, possibly half-decomposed sausage that’s been working hard to bring the sunshine.
But somehow…
it’s been working!! ☀️
Spookily (we’ll come onto the Etsy witches in a minute), the sausages seem to be doing the trick.
The night before, the Roundthorn team are on the weather apps like hawks, having the “Ohhh, we think the ceremony is going to need to be inside. I’m gutted for them. We’ll have to see what they think in the morning” conversation.
Our couples, possibly a little overwhelmed and full of mixed emotions because their wedding day is tomorrow, tell us they’re pinning all their hopes on the sausages and witches for good weather.
“Can we hold out and make the decision in the morning?”
Clearly full of mixed emotions too, the Roundthorn staff agree.
All of a sudden, a three-inch, chicken-filled, long, slimy product is working harder than all the suppliers combined.
The next morning?
The sun’s out. The ceremony’s outside. And we’re all wondering what we were actually worrying about.
At this point, Heck are making an absolute killing on their sausage packets, secretly paying the clouds to stay away.
And just when we thought wedding weather rituals couldn’t get any more interesting…
Another new trend — one we’ve only really come across this summer — is couples turning to Etsy-based witches and practitioners offering rituals, spells and little bundles of mystical magic designed to help encourage sunshine for their wedding day.
Because apparently checking the weather app every six minutes and planting the sausages wasn’t enough.
We have to admit, it’s not quite as fun as finding the perfect patch of grass to dig up, but it’s much faster, possibly a little more economical, and definitely less costly than buying a full pack of sausages.
To whoever is sat behind the computer screen, cashing in on brides’ weather nerves and taking a few quid per spell…
We’re not sure whether to be disappointed or give you a round of applause for the entrepreneurial thinking.
You may have read this far and be wondering:
Where’s the groom and groomsmen in all of this?
Honestly, no clue. And that’s usually how it is for most of the wedding planning. (For the guys who do know what’s going on and help with the jobs, 10/10 for you.)
Ultimately, if planting a sausage or paying a stranger a few quid gives you that extra little bit of reassurance before walking down the aisle, then frankly…
Plant the bloody sausage.
Pay the bloody Etsy witch.
Whichever way you choose to hope for sunshine to be on your side, we’re totally here for it — and we’ll be praying just as hard as you are.
And if the sun comes out the next morning?
We’ll take absolutely no credit.
We’ll simply stand in the sunshine, look knowingly at the sky and say:
“Told you the spell would work.” 🌭☀️
Just remember, when planning your Roundthorn wedding, there are plenty of things we can help you organise…
But the sausage is between you and the weather gods.
Good luck, girlies.
And happy digging. 😂